John loved Jesus. We know this from all of his dealings and his willingness to be obedient. However, we know Jesus loved John, too. John knew to love Jesus was not just doing a bunch of stuff for him. John knew he also had to love His bride, to become the disciple whom Jesus loved. In fact, John was the apostle who said “ Love one another” more times than any other person. He also said “ We love because He first loved us.” If anyone says, "I love God," yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen. ( 1 John 4:19-20 ). John knew Jesus’ love. He experienced it first hand. And that was enough. He loved the church based on Jesus’ love for him.
It wasn’t easy. I’m sure John shed many tears over the church for those people who left because they didn’t like what he was teaching. They were a part of him and the fellowship. In fact, the first few lines of 1 John says “That which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we have seen with our eyes, which we have looked at and our hands have touched—this we proclaim concerning the Word of life. The life appeared; we have seen it and testify to it, and we proclaim to you the eternal life, which was with the Father and has appeared to us. We proclaim to you what we have seen and heard, so that you also may have fellowship with us. And our fellowship is with the Father and with his Son, Jesus Christ. We write this to make our joy complete.” He couldn’t even experience the joy and contentment that comes with knowing Christ because those people were not reconciled to the body. I can’t imagine the great pain he must have felt when his own members started a revolt against him. It was probably comparable to the great pain he must have felt watching his best friend suffering on that cross. But, John knew what it meant to love. He knew it wasn’t self-centered. He didn’t think about himself in that situation. If he had, he would have deserted him just like the other eleven disciples. But, he didn’t He stood and watched every agonizing minute. He even volunteered to take care of Jesus’ grieving mother because he needed someone to care for her. It must have been difficult to see the pain of relationships from Jesus. At the end of his ministry, Jesus’ followers all left because the message got too hard, and the cost became too great. Jesus gave and gave and gave some more. His reward? Rejection. John stood by his side and learned from the best mentor he would ever know. He also knew that in order to be a disciple, he would have to endure the same pain and suffering. He would have to subject himself to the same type of rejection. He also knew he had to follow Jesus’ example and love anyway.
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